It has been an interesting last few weeks for the Ross Hoss. The weeks have been filled with Christmas parties, eggnog, roller skating, lots and lots of pizza, and lots of television.

Here are a few things that I have learned about myself over the last few however long.

1. I love to sit on the couch. This is not exactly a new discovery but one that deserves to be restated every so often. What t.v. shows does the ross hoss watch eh? I love House, 106th and park (yes on B.E.T.), Seinfeld , of course Friends, Sportscenter takes up a lot of my time, and there are a few other shows that I will have to tell you about in person.

2. I am a HORRIBLE roller skater. I arrive fashionably late at the roller skating birthday party, strap on my four wheeled roller skates and hit the rink. I thought I am a semi good athlete surely I can scoot my way around like I did back when I rocked the roller blades at Joelton Skating Rink. Surely. But this was not the case. It was painfully evident within the first twenty seconds of standing up with skates on that I had lost my skating mojo. I hobbled onto the rink floor and only left the wall once all night. The one time I bravely ventured out to the open floor a girl skated up to me, did a sweet stopping move using her skate stub perfectly and asked me if I needed some help….. I said no thanks.

3. I can only handle six mugs worth of eggnog in one sitting. Pour me a seventh and I will be out for the night with a stomach ache.

4. I live out the movie Its a Wonderful Life. George Bailey and I share a lot of personality characteristics. Sometimes I catch George saying things, whether it be to Mary, Clarence, or Old Man Gower that I would say myself.

5. My Holiday Spirit fluctuates depending on the amount of sleep I have had the night before. This may be true for more people as well, but if I do not get my eight hours then I am just a regular old Scrooge the entire day.

6. Exams are for the birds. Exams are stupid. Reece and I were talking and I/we figure post Christmas break we will have forgotten eighty five percent of the knowledge we “gained” during our third semesters of college.

7. The economy actually effects me. My hours are down at flag world largely due to the fact nobody is traveling or buying worthless little souvey items… I, just like the rest of the country, have fallen upon hard times.

8. People in the Middle East throw shoes as an insult. I hope after denying a customer a discount on an Iraqi flag or something he doesn’t take off his snow boots and hurl them at me behind the counter. I would probably just catch them and nicely hand them back. Heck, maybe even throw a Happy Holidays right back at him…

9. If I am out and see either a cool pair of shoes or a flannel jacket I do not contain enough self control to not buy them. I shop therefore I am. Name the artist who coined this phrase and I will buy you a Christmas present.

10. I want to be the Manager of Production at Mansion Entertainment for the rest of my life.

I have to close up shop now. Thank goodness!

Ross the Santa Claus Hoss

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3 Comments

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3 responses to “

  1. Sammi Jo

    Barbara Kruger. Don’t feel bad i can’t skate either, infact i can barely walk across a flat surface. Ithink it’s the Mofitt in us. Don’t forget my present. See-ya christmas.
    Sammi Jo

  2. raleightatum

    11. Remember the time that you made a semi-funny joke, then reminded me and Reece that you had made the joke, desperately pining for a response?

    12. You made a new friend, Roger, at Allie Arnold’s house.

    13. You shared a hot tub with Chris Blowface. A hot tub experience is memorable no matter who it’s with!

    That’s all I got.

  3. Schmoffly

    Ross…you never could skate. It might be related to the fact that you can’t even bend over to touch your knees, much less your toes.

    I have always been of the mind that exams are pointless. I think an end of the semester paper where you have to tie in at least three key topics studied and draw a relationship between them all would be a better measure of knowledge.

    The fact that you have raised your tolerance of egg nog enough to handle six glasses of eggnog makes me throw up a little in my mouth. But, knowing your persistance in all things related to sitting on a couch, I bet you will be able to throw back seven without a grimace by the end of Christmas break!

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